“We only feel like being good for those to whom we are attached to. We weren't meant to raise and teach children whose hearts we did not have. We have resorted to all kinds of tricks with our children because we don't have enough natural attachment power to do our job. When we use these tricks, we insult the relationship.”
― Gordon Neufeld
― Gordon Neufeld
Connection through curriculum.
This is our guiding phrase at the Peaceful Press because when we break the connection with our children through yelling or emotional distance many other issues come up.
Instead, when we simplify schooling and build in moments of connection over beautiful stories and playful learning through projects we create an atmosphere that supports parent child attachment.
While homeschooling, it might feel like being ahead of the grade in math, or reading well at age 6 is the goal, but academic goals and standards are a very small part of a whole and healthy child, and those goals are easily met when the child is developmentally ready.
Most kids will learn to read. Most children will develop sufficient math skills to pursue their calling, but when we convey to our children the idea that they are stupid, annoying, or a bother because we've overloaded them with work and underemphasized a warm and loving connection to us, bigger problems will occur.
So, if you are struggling with a child who won't finish their work, first spend some cheerful time reading and talking together and then assign them half the math problems, done correctly.
If you are struggling with a child who won't sit down to learn, try sitting beside them while they write, or let them dictate a story to you, or turn it into a game of Mother May I.
And make sure that you are getting connection and rest as well. In the midst of winter, it's easy to get bored and discouraged, the routines become humdrum, but when you build in moments of celebration and connection for yourself and your children, you can regain your stamina and joy.
This might be baking a cake, or taking a walk with a friend. Celebrating for you might mean a quiet few hours while your husband runs child duty, or going sledding as a family, but taking time to recreate and play helps reset your own sense of calm after a hard week, and gives you the fresh wind you need to keep loving and connecting with your child.
And if you need more ideas for connection through curriculum, check out our bundles. We incorporate heartwarming stories, yummy recipes, poetry, art, history and science into simple daily lessons that bring joy and peace to family life.